WHY TEACHERS GET HEADACHES... — School-College Jokes — Funny Jokes
WHY TEACHERS GET HEADACHES... ~ Funny Jokes

WHY TEACHERS GET HEADACHES...

Teacher: George, go to the map and find North America.
George: Here it is!
Teacher: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
Class: George!

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Teacher: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
Willy: Me!

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Substitute Teacher: Are you chewing gum?
Billy: No, I'm Billy Anderson.

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Teacher: Alfred, how can one person make so many mistakes in one day?
Alfred: I get up early.

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Teacher: Didn't you promise to behave?
Student: Yes, sir.
Teacher: And didn't I promise to punish you if you didn't?
Student: Yes, sir, but since I broke my promise, you didn't have to keep yours.

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Teacher: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
Tommy: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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Harold: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Harold: Good, because I didn't do my homework.

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Teacher: Why are you late?
Webster: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Webster: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." That's what I did.

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Teacher: I hope I didn't see you looking at Don's paper.
Don: I hope you didn't either.

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Gary: I don't think I deserve a zero on this test.
Teacher: I agree, but it's the lowest mark I can give you.

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Mother: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?
Junior: Because of absence.
Mother: You mean you were absent on the day of the test?
Junior: No, but the kid who sits next to me was.

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Sylvia: Dad, can you write in the dark?
Father: I think so. What do you want me to write?
Sylvia: Your name on this report card.

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Teacher: Well, at least there's one thing I can say about your son.
Father: What's that?
Teacher: With grades like these, he couldn't be cheating.

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Hygiene Teacher: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
Jose: Don't bite any.

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Teacher: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."
Ellen: I is...
Teacher: No, Ellen. Always say "I am."
Ellen: All right. "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

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Teacher: Max, use "defeat," "defense" and "detail" in a sentence.
Max: The rabbit cut across the field, and defeat went over defense before detail.

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Mother: Why on earth did you swallow the money I gave you?
Junior: You said it was my lunch money.

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Teacher: If you received $10 from 10 people, what would you have?
Sasha: A new bike.

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Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?
Vincent: One dollar.
Teacher (sadly): You don't know your arithmetic.
Vincent (sadly): You don't know my father.

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Teacher: If I had 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what would I have?
Class Comedian: Big hands!

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"Isn't the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl.
"Say, do you know who I am?" asked the girl.
"No."
"I'm the principal's daughter."
"And do you know who I am?" asked the boy.
"No," she replied.
"Thank goodness!"

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