Hilarious One Liners — Funny One Liners — Funny Jokes
Hilarious One Liners ~ Funny Jokes

Hilarious One Liners

  • Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.
  • Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.
  • Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
  • I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash.
  • A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.
  • Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
  • Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without, but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.
  • You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.
  • Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
  • Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
  • Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.
  • My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.
  • Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
  • Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
  • A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
  • You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.
  • It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
  • Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.
  • Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.
  • Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something
  • They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak!
  • It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.
  • There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.
  • There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it.

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